


Rumor Has It

by thanku4urlove



Category: Hey! Say! JUMP, Johnny's Entertainment, Nakayama Yuma - Fandom
Genre: Explicit Language, Implied orgy, M/M, Originally Posted on LiveJournal, Sexual innuendos, dick talk, yeah again I have nothing to say for myself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 11:11:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20795711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thanku4urlove/pseuds/thanku4urlove
Summary: What's the difference between nine dicks and a joke? Yuma can't take a joke.





	Rumor Has It

**Author's Note:**

> High school me was an idiot. And, as evidence may suggest, a pervert. This was a complete joke that I was bullied into posting, so now it's here. It's so stupid, but I hope it makes you laugh anyway.

At first, the rumor had been terrible. While it had never got out to the public, it spread through the Jimusho like strep throat, and the way Yuma couldn't help but blush when asked about it made all of his denials not at all credible. It became a common topic of conversation in the dressing rooms, in the practice rooms, and just about everywhere, and the whispers were becoming impossible to ignore.

"I mean, everyone and their grandmother knows that Hey! Say! JUMP are close as a group, but I thought the whole orgy thing was only something Arashi and Kanjani8 did."

"And the fact that Yuma was... I mean, he is legal age, and he was on tour with them the whole time, but..."

"I heard from Genta, who heard from Daisuke, that he took all of them."

"All nine?"

"..."

"Oh my god. I don't know if that's terrifying or impressive."

The rumor didn't used to be very extravagant at all. It had been one of those 'so-and-so got it on with so-and-so in x-location' rumors that floated around about once a week. It had started off that Yuma himself had gotten it on with Yamada backstage, during a JUMP tour. But that was much too boring, morphing into Yuma walking in on Yamada and Yuto engaging in recreational activities and just not leaving. The ever-present, adamant, and insistent Ariyama shippers gave the same situation, except that Daiki had also been there. By the end of the week, Yuma had discovered that he had somehow managed to become a super sex god that could fit nine dicks in his ass, which was quite a surprise to him. It was an interesting, unwelcome development, because all that had really happened was Yamada asked for Yuma to tie his shoe backstage while he changed shirts. Innocent as could be. The whole exchange had lasted a little over a minute, and what it had evolved to was incredibly dramatic.

"You don't have to dance today, it's okay." Yuma's choreographer said when he showed up for work.

"My butt is fine." Yuma deadpanned, knowing what the man was talking about. The choreographer shook his head.

"You don't have to act strong in front of me. It's okay."

"Nothing happened!" He insisted, but was waved away and told to go home. In his anger he accidentally stubbed his toe rather hard on the door jamb as he left, giving himself a rather noticeable limp as he made his way to JUMP's practice room. This had to be sorted out, and it had to be sorted out now.

"Yu-chan! Have you heard?" Chinen asked, walking over to greet him as he entered.

"That all of you managed to stick it in my ass? At the same time? Yeah, I heard." Yuma sighed. "It's all I've been hearing."

"Hey, I'd be proud if I were you." Inoo advised. "Own it."

"I don't want to own it!" Yuma protested. "I don't want people to think it's true! It's absolutely horrible!"

"Then why were you limping when you came in here?" Takaki asked, eyebrow raised playfully.

"I stubbed my toe on--"

"Everyone knows you have a crush on Yama-chan. We're only happy to help your wet dreams come true." Chinen said, tone suggesting that he was expecting gratitude, patting Yuma on the shoulder. Yuma jolted away, looking completely affronted by the statement, as well as the laughter following it.

"I don't have a... You didn't..." He ran a furious hand through his hair. "Couldn't you guys help me out of this? You're all being dicks."

"Well, you would know." Hikaru said, the entire room exploding into laughter again. Deciding that he was both not getting anywhere and that he didn't need to take this abuse, Yuma left the room, trying not to favor his swollen toe, walking normally to avoid suspicion.

The rumor was never disproved or spoken against by JUMP, and therefore persisted, putting Yuma in a strange position. At first, people gave him a wide girth in the hallways and looked at him with impressed eyes. When Yuma found he could use the rumor to his advantage, to both give threats--"are you sure you want to disagree with the man that can fit nine dicks in his ass?"--and as bragging rights--"well, this one time on tour..."--he decided to do as Inoo suggested. He owned it.

"At least Yuma isn't mad anymore." Yamada said with a sigh, brushing his sweaty bangs out of his eyes.

"I just don't know what he got so fussed up about." Takaki answered, grabbing a shirt and throwing it on.

"That's Keito's." Yuto said, which caused Takaki to take the shirt off again and toss it to its owner. "Maybe he was afraid of Yasuda."

Both Inoo and Chinen nodded in agreement as they disentangled themselves. "I wouldn't want my title of ultimate uke stolen either." Inoo said. Hikaru was still on his back on the floor, putting one arm around a shoulder of the two on either side of him, Yabu and Daiki, and laughing a bit.

"As if we'd invite him to one of our orgies."


End file.
